Message #42726

[CrazyHobo]

- Fat giant lizard freak!!! KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!
Scalpel was in a frenzy. He was slicing monsters into ribbons with his rapier and shot streams of fire from his hand. He laughed maniacally and so great was his fun that a wicked grin could be made out in the mist surrounding his face...a grin made out of razor sharp teeth. Hobo, on the other hand, was cool and level headed. He stabbed a goblin-like demon in the chest, then fired at a suicide bombing demon from his revolver, causing a number of little demons to die. He had killed enough demons to forge a small firearm. Just what one would need to pick off these nasty suiciders from a distance. Scalpel knew magic thanks to the vivid imagination Hobo has. They were killing off weak demons in this landmass. Lucky for them, the voices didn't think Hobo would enter his mind and forge an alliance with his ego. They didn't have a static defence in this area. Only the True Self was protected.
Suddenly, they both hear the sound of very loud footsteps, as though a giant is walking in their direction. Both turn towards the direction of the noise and see a giant monster marching towards them. Covered in blood and with blades protructing from it's hands, the beast takes notice of the two and gives out a nasty roar. Hobo asks his ego
- What is that thing?
- That's a result of your twisted **** imagination! The voices took hold of all the monsters you've ever thought up or seen in real life and now use them as minions. There's more like these in the deeper areas of the soul.
- How do you kill it?
- Go for the legs first...
Just as Scalepl barely finished his sentence, Hobo rushed at the monster.
- ****! Wait for meeee! - uttered Scalpel and followed Hobo's fashion.
 The being raised it's sword hands upwards for a devastating strike. It had the intentions of turning Hobo into a wet spot of blood. But as it's arms plummeted towards the ground, Hobo jump-rolled to the side, dodging the attack, then made his way around the beast and stabbed it in the leg. It fell on one knee. Scalpel ran up to the beast, jumped on the downed knee, then ran his way up the beast's arm to the shoulder. He then jumped at the head and grabbed the beasts long nose. He cut both eyes of the beast with one swing. Knowing that it will jerk in pain, Scalpel made a backward summersault to gain distance with the beast.
Hobo ran up to Scalpel and asked
- Ok, now what?
- Strike the heart.
- Got it.
- I'll go for the legs, you be ready to take it down.
The beast started swinging it's arms at random in hopes of hitting the two, but Scalpel managed to dodge every swipe it did, got to the legs and began stabbing, cutting and downright amputating the beast's legs. It fell on both knees in agony. Hobo used the opportunity to run up on one of the hands, then lunged at the beasts abdomen with his blade. He stabbed it, held firmly to the handle of his blade and let gravity do the work: under his weight, he descended down, cutting the beast all the way.
Scalpel got out of the way in time before the beast fell dead on it's back. Having their weapons sheathed, Hobo speaks:
- If there are more of these things, we'll need some better weapons.
- Tell me about it. I need a **** bazooka!
Then an interesting thing occurs: the corpse of the giant beast dissolves into a black mist. Yet in the darkness of the mist, a white light tried to break through. Hobo and Scalpel approached the light. What they saw trully surprised them: a girl. Well, what seemed to be a spirit of a girl. Short, probably less than 160cm, cute, long hair and with beautiful silver eyes. Hobo kneels before her, starts rubbing her ghostly hair gently and stares at her cute face.
- Oh Igor. After almost 30 years you're still melodramatic.
- I haven't seen her for almost 30 years....
- And you still care? This is the girl that nearly drove you to suicide, when you were 16 years old. You still care?!
The ghost awakens, takes notice of Hobo and how he is caring for her. She slowly rises and rests her head on his shoulder. Hobo utters
- She looked like an angel. We had so many things in common. We even thinked of same things at almost the same time....and she turned out to be a wrench...
- Well, in your mind, she's still the perfect angel you remember her as.
Hobo gives out a loud sigh and then grabs the ghost by the neck. He slowly squezes it, looking into the fearful eyes of the ghost girl. Her ghostly body slowly begins to transform into a trail of light energy. When she becomes and orb of light in his hand, Hobo finally rises.
- Just as how she deceived me into believing she is innocent and defenceless, so will minions made out of memories about her misguide the demons. Scalpel, say Anal Beads to the first addition to our mental army.
With those words uttered, Hobo released the energy out of his hand. A bright light blinded the two for a short time, then out of a white mist, the duo saw a pack of....cute, little teddy bears.
Scalpel stared at the little things. If his face could be seen, one would most likely see him with his jaw dropped and unable to grasp what his eyes are seeing.
- Teddy bears? TEDDY BEARS??!! Are you serious?
Scalpel approaches one of the little things.
- These things won't survive a second out there! Why did you....
Scalpel continues to rant, oblivious to what the little bears are doing behind him. Morphing from cute and colorful to morbid and black, they raise their talon hands towards Scalpel. He finally takes notice
- Oh holy ****!
He jumps away just in time to dodge an attack.
Hobo gives out a small chuckle. Scalpel then replies.
- Well then, in this way, they'll come in handy.
Hobo looks over the pack of teddy bears, who have now morphed back into their cute forms.
- Just like Katya...
He then turns arond and focuses his sight upon another landmass. It has more demons there. But the duo now have strength as well. Raising one hand, Hobo signals his newly acquired pack to attack the next landmass.